At the law firm of Riebling, Proto & Sachs, LLP, located in White Plains,
Westchester County, NY our White Plains Divorce lawyers have encountered
countless situations in
divorce cases where one of the spouses chooses to do something either without consulting
with their attorney or against the advice of their attorney. In many instances,
this could have an adverse, if not fatal, impact upon their legal position
in the divorce and the in the courtroom. Below is a list of common DO
NOTS for people seeking a divorce in Westchester County, NY or elsewhere.
Common DO NOTS in a Westchester County, NY Divorce
Hide things from your attorney. Your attorney needs to be prepared to deal with
all issues in your divorce case at all times, at any time. If you conceal things
from your attorney you run the risk of your attorney being caught off guard and
this could obviously cause big problems for you because your attorney will
not be prepared to deal with those issues. Also, if you hide things from
your attorney and your spouse presents your hidden information, i.e. emails
you thought you erased, hiding large sums of money, your credibility with
the Court could be shot
- Fail to stay in communication with your attorney.
Say disparaging things about your spouse to your children or in the presence of your
children. This could easily undermine your custody position or at the very
least be the
starting point for your custody position being undermined.
- Act angry or hostile in the courtroom. Th negative impression upon the
judge will speak for itself and make you appear irrational.
- Speak with your spouse’s lawyer for any reason.
Compare your divorce case with what you heard a friend got in their divorce
their advice. Each divorce case is very unique because everyone’s
different. The only person to listen to is your attorney, the person with
the knowledge of
the law that you are paying to protect your best interests in your divorce.
Get into nasty verbal battles and arguments with your spouse on voicemail,
or any other social media. If you can’t say it in front of the judge,
don't say it at all.
Introducing your children to you new boyfriend or girlfriend to your children
Have your boyfriend or girlfriend attend court appearances. This will only
fuel anger and
resentment with your spouse and add fuel to the fire and they run the risk
of becoming a
Fail, refuse or neglect to read all a court order in your case. If you
violate a court order,
the judge will not care that you did not read it and you will have to face
- Make settlement proposals that you are not fully prepared to accept.
Deny visitation because your spouse did not pay sum or all of court ordered child
support. This will not be viewed by a judge as acting in the best interests of your
Fail to consult with an accountant or CPA regarding the tax implications
of your potential
Pay any child support payments directly to your spouse in cash. You will
have no record
of the payment if your spouse forgets about it or has sudden and convenient amnesia.
Be unreasonable simply because of spite, anger or frustration. Keep in
mind that the
more unreasonable you are, the more unreasonable your spouse is likely
This will only serve to extend the length of the divorce process and in
the meantime cots you a lot of extra time and money on your divorce lawyer.
Inherent in the word
“settlement” is the word “compromise” which means
you will not get everything that you
want in your divorce.
Forget to make a picture or video inventory of all items in your household
in order to
protect against your spouse from destroying or removing the items.
- Forget to go to the safe deposit box and make an inventory of its contents.
Be unreasonable with your spouse’s parental access to your children.
This will cut
against your custody position as it very likely that the Court will view
your actions as not in the children’s best interests and your spouse
will claim that it is an example of your poor parental judgment.
The Bottom Line
The DO NOT list can go on and on but the best thing to do is not make things
worse for yourself by not knowing the DO NOTS. That is why you should
never be your own lawyer and that this is why you should always have an
experienced and skilled lawyer at your side at all times to protect your
White Plains Divorce Lawyers Here to Help You in Your Westchester County,
The biggest DO in any divorce is to consult with an experienced and skilled
divorce lawyer. Our firm offers FREE CONSULTATIONS in all divorce cases.
We encourage you to contact our firm to speak with one of our experienced
and skilled White Plains divorce lawyers to assist you. Please contact
us by calling us at (914) 840-5104 or online.
So there you have it. Forty things not to do during your divorce. This
list is by no means exhaustive. There are plenty of other things you shouldn’t
do during your divorce. Like right now, I just remembered that I failed
to tell you that you should never discuss advice or strategy received
from your attorney with other persons. That destroys the attorney-client
privilege and the attorney on the other side is free to obtain this type
of information in discovery. You don’t want that to happen so keep your